Each month on the fourth tuesday, I opening me and talk about different parts of my life.
Today, I will opening me on 3 things why I’m proud of me. If I should have done this post in the beginning of last year, I could not have found 3 things why I’m proud of me but today I can found 3 things, I can to be proud of me! With borderline personality disorder and symptoms who accompanies this mental disorder it was hard to be able to be proud of me but I’m managed so much some things that I did and that what’s my impressed myself and for I proud of me.
Today it’s… 3 Things Why I’m proud of Me.
1. Manage to fighting my fear to be alone outside. It’s recently since beginning of november 2017 and I’m proud of me for fighting this anxiety to be alone outside. My principal anxiety to be alone outside… it’s to be assaulted, I mean by that, to be physical assaulted. All bad things that there is in this world and bad peoples, all news on tv and internet,… I watch never or rarely if not after I have again more fear because 70% on news are some bad things, bad peoples attack, kill, commit terror attacks. Some terror attacks I haven’t fear anymore of that but I have fear of bad peoples and to be alone outside in the city in cause of these bad peoples. My psychiatrist has helped me a lot on this because if before I went always outside and at my psychiatrist visits with my parents, last year she has accepted to accompany me outside in the city and after few times like that in the beginning of november I can managed to go alone to my psychiatrist visits… since I go always alone sometimes my anxiety are more high because I see some bad peoples all around me but same if a day I had more anxiety it did stop me and I do not abandoned, the next week I can returned alone. For all that I’m proud so much of me.
2. Learn to skiing. I did it alone, I learn alone completely alone with no teacher and lesson, I just listening a lot around me and I was to able to do and learn basics for skiing, I’m really so proud of me, when on the slops I looked around me everybody are learning with lessons, teachers or family peoples but me I had nobody, sometimes when I thinking I can to be sad that everyone have someone for learn ski and me not but after again again again a lot of thinking, I took that like a strenght to learn ski alone and I’m proud of me I don’t know if on what I am more proud of me for learn ski alone or despite of my mental illness to be able to transform from sad to a strenght to have to do it alone. THE BOTH PROBABLY!
3. Work on my anxiety without anxiolytics. Last year the first five months of the year I took some anxiolytics after I chosen to stop them despite that my anxiety was always here, I’m now to almost 8 months without anxiolytics, I work on my anxiety without anxiolytics since almost 8 months after during 5 months of anxiolytics treatment, it was hard, it’s not always easy, I wanted regularly take them again but I’m managed do not to do it. I’m proud of me for that. I blogged many posts about stopping my anxiolytics treatment and the after… , One month without Anxiolytics with the withdrawal HERE, Three months without Anxiolytics Update post HERE, Six months without Anxiolytics Update post HERE.
This was 3 Things why I’m proud of me.
Previously Tuesday Opening.
See you tomorrow for a What’s Up Without Food.